I Cried a Little

I cried a little today.  Strange but true. I had watched a television show about two people who had shut themselves off from love due to past hurt.  Today they finally let their guard down long enough to realize how deeply they cared for each other.  I took a moment to have a pity party all by myself and I shed a couple of tears and asked God why. Why is it so hard for some people to love and be loved.  I did not like the answer.  If we reap the harvest that we have planted, than the harvest we are reaping is a direct result of our own planting.  If one desires to be loved unconditionally, than one must, indeed, love unconditionally.  A person must accept another person the way they are, warts and all, if that same person wishes to be accepted the way God created that person to be, warts and all. We do not, usually,  like this answer.  We want the other person to change.  We want that person to ride in on a white horse and carry us away.  But the truth is, we can not change anyone except ourselves.  If we want our mate to be a better person, than we must start by being a better person ourselves.  So, here is my resolve for my own personal life; to stop complaining every time I pick up a plate left in the living room, to stop mentioning the obvious every time a pair of socks are let on the floor, to stop being the one who waits to see if someone is going to take out the trash (just do it).  I am not sure if I will be successful the first attempt, or the second, or the third.  But if I am better tomorrow than I was today, it will be a good day.  If I am better next week than this week, it will be an awesome week.  If I am better next year than this year, I will rejoice.  I do not have to perfect this over night.  I just have to be better.  Better everyday than the day before.  If I am tempted 6 times tomorrow and overcome one time, it is a victory.  If by next year I am still tempted 6 times but overcome 3 times, I will rejoice.  Someday I will look back and realize that I was not even tempted on that day.  It no longer taunts me.  Every day strive to be better than the day before and it will be good enough..
Blessings

Joyce

Momma

I was told 6 1/2 years ago that momma had 2 to 3 weeks to live.  Maybe 2 to 3 years at best.  My brother stayed with her for the first 3 years and then she came to live with me.  She is a survivor.  She went to the hospital for an asthma attack and had surgery for a very aggressive thyroid cancer.  She lost her vocal cords, and her ability to swallow.  She has a tracheotomy and a feeding tube.  But as you can see in the photo, she did not lose her ability to smile.  I was lying in bed tonight allowing my mind to go places it probably should not go.  The reality of her age (84) and all of her medical problems lead me to thinking about the fact that one day soon (not to soon, hopefully) she will indeed go on to be with Jesus.  I thought about the momma shaped hole it would leave in my life.  Only one thing can fill a hole like that...God, Himself.
One of my children's church kiddos told me about a computerized shape sorter for toddlers.  Sometimes you can force a round peg into a square hole, but the computer would recognize it as a wrong shape and cause it to drop out the bottom so the toddler would have to try again and fill the hole correctly.  This 10 year old boy then told me that the toy was like the God shaped hole in our hearts.  He said no matter how hard you try to fill it with something else, it will never be filled until the day you fill it with God.  Pretty deep stuff for a 10 year old.
So when that day comes that I must say good by for now to my momma, I must remember that the only thing that can fill that hole that she will leave in my life is God.  I am not much of a drinker and even less in favor of medication.  I know people who try to fill the holes in their lives with those two things though.  They are temporary fillers that cause the hole to be even larger when the hangovers hit and the meds wear off.  But God.  That is all you need to know.  But God.  I have heard so many ex drunks and drug addicts give their testimony and then they say "But God".  "But God had a different plan for my life." "But God decided to step in" " But God knew better".  When that day comes and someday I give my testimony on how I got through it, I will say, But God moved and filled my momma shaped hole with His presence.   But God.
I know this has NOTHING to do with purses, but I need to share.  My mom and I laugh together, we cry together, we get mad at each other, we boss each other around, but mostly, at the end of the day, we love each other.  Give your momma a hug tonight and think about filling the God shaped hole in your life with the very presence of God Himself.
Blessings,

Joyce

Happy Birthday to me!  Yesterday was my birthday!  I am now 57 years old.  I am not quite sure how this happened.  It was just yesterday that I was 18 and still rocking a bikini.  My mid drift has not seen the sun in so long now that it would blind you with how white it is!  But (there is always a but), I would not go back again.  I love where I am in life these days.  I love every bit of my 57 years; the wrinkles, the fat, the memories, all of it. Two of my closest friends came over yesterday and had a birthday tea party just for me.  We spent the day talking about past, present, and future.
I think it was only suppose to last a couple of hours, but as usual, we stretched it out to about 9 hours.  We laughed, we peed a little, and then we laughed some more!  We talked about everything...and I mean everything! I could not and would not have appreciated a tea party when I was 18.  I could not and would not have appreciated the importance of life time friendships when I was 18.  Both things that I now embrace and enjoy.  There is something about a cup of tea with friends.  Good friends do not come along very often, so when you find yours, do not ever let go.  There are highs and lows and everything in between along the way.  The stories you share from years gone by will fill your heart and overflow your eyes with tears.  We have been through death, birth, husbands, jobs, ministries, and every other conceivable situation in our friendships.  Sometimes I am a little jealous of these two remarkable women that God has placed in my life.  At 24 years of friendship, I am still the new kid on the block.  They have known each other since high school.  I came in about 15 years later.  They talk about high school dance team and people from the past that I do not know.  That is ok though and I really don't mind.  We have 24 years of memories together that are irreplaceable.  The day culminated with prayer.  They both gathered around me and prayed a prayer of blessing over my life.  What more could a person ask for.  Thank you Shari and Shana.  My tea party was exquisite, but the best gift I got was from God and that was the gift of you.  I love you.
Blessings
Joyce

OH, the smell of leather!
It has now been 9 years of learning and experimenting and here I am presenting my first all leather handbag.  What a journey it has been.  After making this bag, I found a youtube video on making leather bags that explained some of the difficulties I had.  It was a series of 6 two hour videos and I spent the better part of the day watching them.  I can not wait to get back out in the shop and put to use the things I learned.  I now have a 35 x 52 foot shop of which I have 8x35 feet of the space.  My husband took the rest of the space for his wood working!  However, my 8 x 35 has air conditioning and wood heat, so it was a trad off.  Anyway, I digress!  The purse below is my very first all leather purse.  I am very pleased with it considering it was my first.  The great thing about my customers is that they always push me beyond my abilities.  They never allow me to settle in to my comfort zone for very long.  I must admit, it took forever to get this one done considering that in the middle of making it, I developed a virus from you know where!  It hung on forever and then turned into bronchial  pneumonia and then pulled muscles in my rib cage from coughing so hard.   It took a total of 6 weeks to completely heal and I am still working on getting my strength back.  Then I was finally able to finish the purse.  It is a very late Christmas present for a friend's mother.  I hope she loves it. Anyhow, back to the videos on you tube, the gentleman in the video mentioned that he gives classes in Houston Tx.  It is $800 to attend and I am seriously considering it.  There is so much to learn and apply.  That is all for now.  Everyone have a great 2016!